


Drown

by Imageman



Category: The Maze Runner (Movies), The Maze Runner Series - James Dashner
Genre: M/M, Madness, Newt's suicide, P250, P250 Rewrite, POV Newt, What Have I Done
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-04
Updated: 2015-12-04
Packaged: 2018-05-04 20:37:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 933
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5347760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Imageman/pseuds/Imageman
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Newt hated the place, hated every second of everyday. Yet he called it his best time ever.</p><p>(Based on P250)</p><p>See end notes for Chinese version</p>
            </blockquote>





	Drown

**Author's Note:**

> Plot based on Chapter 55 in The Death Cure, trying to explain why Newt had committed suicide and what was he thinking before Thomas approached him  
> Do not own them (I wish I could)

He was having fever when the pain took over him, he was boiled, rotten and sinking into the ground. His skin caught fire as his brain was slowly teared into pieces, the vague image in front of him shifted like shadows fading.  
It’s strange to feel like dying when you’re so certain you’re not. It’s the changing. He won’t die, he will only no longer be himself.

Another steam of light pulled him out of the darkness. His eyes widened as he heard muffled voices bubble up beside him, which felt like miles away. He was gasping and trying to hold onto anything he could cling to, but his strength drifted away. He felt warmth, and heat started to drove off. He was dumped into darkness again, memories like melodies swallowed him.

Newt gazed his surrounding as he stood. He was in the maze, exactly the same as his memory painted. He was standing right under the huge walls. He felt a weird but steady faith that he was not going to stay, he was going to leave, or die trying.  
He paused, he knew he didn’t stand a chance, or was death his actual aim? That remained a question, though questions did not mean anything anymore. He was out in the maze, the sun hadn’t set yet, and he’s enjoying this last moment of peace and loneliness. It felt great after he had made the decision, as if he had finally gotten control over something, even though that meant his death. 

He started climbing as he felt a gust of wind blew from somewhere deeper in the maze, he got hold on the ivy, the leaves were brushing against his skin. It wasn’t easy to climb, he slipped down several times and his knees were bleeding. Yet he wondered how deep faith one could ever put up, not for continuing their life but ending it.  
Newt continued his journey, feeling steady as his hands worn out, the pain was real while everything else seemed fake. He held firm on the vines and let them cut deep into the wound.

With the reality cutting deeper into his skin he shall be freed. Newt thought, he will be free.

He stopped half way to the top of the cliff, hanging himself to the ivy with both hands and turned back. He could not see any Grievers in his sight, and the sun was setting. The maze remained all peace and even brutally beautiful. It was an artificial art and mystery. It felt good dying here. 

Alby and George did not noticed when he sneaked out, yet they might be looking for him now. He had been focusing on the exact moment when the doors closed since he arrived, now he was counting down.

Hopefully he would die immediately, bones crashing to pieces or breaking his neck. He didn’t think he would enjoy being torn up by Grievers alive, but presumed it a pretty good sacrifice and payback to whoever bastards put them up here. He wouldn’t allow himself to obey, being forced to the rules of staying in the Glade in order to merely survive. He was going to live, live happily and brightly even for a few seconds. Then he would gladly return his body to the bastards in the most exaggerate way he could think of.

It’s either a show or a fight back. Newt smiled as another wind blew by. He took one last shot at the sun and the vague horizon being blocked by the maze. 

He loosened his hands.

It was quick, yet not quick enough for him to feel nothing. He felt dizzy and his way back down was not smooth. He got tangled up in the ivy for a few times but gravity pulled him down. He heard wind, not being able to open his eyes and his ears were humming. In the process he felt freedom and he relaxed. It was good. It was perfect. It was bloody perfect to die under his own choice.

It wasn’t until he hit the ground that he noticed he was still alive. He opened his eyes due to the smash, his head bumping from the ground and everything hurt. He felt pain, unbelievably soothing pain. All over his body the shiver came, he could no longer feel his body, and in the loss of his blood he could see a vague figure walking towards him.

He tried to narrow his eyes and get a better look, but he could not move. For some unknown reasons he knew deep down he could trust that figure, he knew him, although he could not tell his name. And he had came here to end all his pain.

He’ll set him free. Even Newt himself had failed in the attempt.

Newt smiled, and all of a sudden the lights pulled him out of the memory. 

“Tommy.” He murmured.

He felt burning and trembling inside, everything he see was as if behind the mist. He could here groaning of cranks not far beside, but the voice came over them.

“Hey. Newt.” The voice softly transferred through the air.“ It’s me, Thomas. You still remember me, right?”    
There he came. Newt let out a breath. His Tommy had came to end his misery. From the very hell he was living in to the best time he could never return to. He felt relieved, and down he drowned in all his happiness and pains. His mistrust, his regret, his light and the very of his desires.

“I bloody remember you, Tommy.” Newt spoke with clear consciousness.

**Author's Note:**

> Fin?
> 
> Let’s turn to Page 249 of The Death Cure and continue:)  
> Enjoy! 
> 
> \---
> 
> Go to http://leftundone.lofter.com/post/20e6c4_92311d1 if you prefer to read it in Chinese  
> Or search 5-11 on LOFTER and it is the latest post  
> Translated by myself


End file.
